If you have known me for any time, you will know that I call a spade a spade and don't take crap from anyone. Having said that, there's nothing I like more than a little bit of fun and pulling someone's strings if I think they really deserve it. I call it 'Abbott Karma'. 'Abbott Karma' is when someone wishes me evil and I turn it around on them to make them feel worse than they tried to make me feel, or even expose them for being a fraud.
Greedygirl already knows how futile it is to try and make me feel awful. According to her, I have no emotions or feelings at all. Of course she knows that from years of experience, but many people don't. Once such person who didn't know what I am like sent me the following email:
"... my user name is supposed to be xxxxxxxxx for some reason i cant play if you prefer i can go somewhere else to get a sign up bonus. I have 2 small children and limited time so i m sure u can understand my frustration. ..."
17 minutes later she emailed me the following:
"... Just wanted to thank you for allowing me to waste my sons nap trying to get a membership that you will make money off of. You can forget it and when I inform your sponsoring casinos that I will make no future deposits with them as a result that will be my bonus. Have a rotten day because you certainly deserve it. ..."
As most members know, I live in Australia, so these emails came in for me at just after 4am on Sunday morning. GoneGambling is not a casino and we do not provide 24 hour support or responses to emails. Most days we do respond to emails within 12 hours, but apart from the time frame, even more important is the fact that we DO respond. How many sites have you emailed and never received a response from? Dozens if not hundreds would be my bet.
If there is one thing I can't stand, it's impatience. In my experience it is impatience from the people I deal with that adds most to my workload. In fact, without a doubt it is impatience that is mainly responsible for slowing down our system that has worked perfectly well for many years with a normal 12 hour turn around time for email responses. I have said it before and I will say it again. Sending multiple emails about the same thing within minutes of each other doesn't get the problem sorted any faster, it only slows things down.
When I investigated why her membership was not working, I discovered that she had signed up twice. Our program detected that as cheating and would not allow her to complete the second sign up. Her first sign up was not confirmed either. This was possibly due to a typo she made in her email address or the confirmation email going astray or just plain impatience.
So, how was I to respond to this impatient woman's threats to harm my business? She was obviously walking a fine line between sanity and becoming a screaming raving lunatic who would be issuing threats, posting everywhere and bombarding me with emails every few minutes. I have dealt with dozens of others who were just like this, and the signs are always the same. What triggered both her emails was the thought that we were wasting her free time in trying to sign up for membership while her son napped. She did NOT want to waste that time in trying to gain a valid membership to our site. But she was quite happy to threaten to waste that time in the future in contacting our sponsoring casinos and telling them how evil we are. What an idiot! What a mean and nasty streak she has. What a vicious and unfair woman. She didn't even know me, but because she didn't get what she wanted in an unrealistic time frame, she was prepared to harm the reputation of my business that I have worked for seven years at building.
My usual response to someone like this would be candid and straight to the point. At GoneGambling the customer is only right some of the time, and when they are not right we make sure we let them know where they went wrong. In this case, instead of responding by telling the woman that she is nothing but a 'moronic, vicious, selfish person who will lash out and blame anyone but themselves for what has happened to them. And that is wasn't my fault she had two small children and was stuck at home and frustrated, because although I have done a lot of things, I didn't father her kids', I decided to experiment. I sent the following email within 11 hours of receiving her emails:
"... Hi xxxxxxxxx,
I'm terribly sorry for the problems you have experienced in trying to sign up for membership of GoneGambling. I'm the only person who runs the site and it is how I clothe and feed my two young children. They are both girls. One is 8 years old and the other will turn 5 in October. Their mother died two weeks ago and to help them forget I took them away for the night. Unfortunately it was at the same time that you tried to sign up for membership.
I couldn't afford to take the girls away and had to put it all on my credit card. I don't make much money from the site but we do scrape by. I don't blame you for wanting to cause me trouble with the casinos on our site. I really should have been here when you needed me. I feel so awful that I have let you down. I don't know how I'll make ends meet if you do email the casinos and they stop paying us the little they do. I'm so upset about what has happened. I'm sitting here in tears as the past couple of weeks come flooding back. I don't know what the future holds for me and my girls. I'm starting to ramble now. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have even said any of this. It's not your problem.
Please forgive me for not being here when you needed me. I'll delete your sign up now so that you don't get any emails from our automatic program. I really didn't mean to upset you and waste your time. I am so sorry.
Of course the above is nothing but a tissue of lies. My wife is still alive and kicking and I have the black eye to prove it! I justified the lies by telling myself it was an experiment to see what her response would be. I would of course come clean and let her know a little way down the track what the truth was. I must be honest and say that I expected either one of two reactions from her. The first was that there would be no response at all because she would be so embarrassed at launching an attack on someone who she didn't even know and who had done her no harm. The second was that she would apologise for her threats and emails to a grieving man.
This is the response she sent:
"... If you forward their mothers name we could probably get the casinos to do a donation in her memory for the girls future education. ..."
It wasn't exactly the response I expected. For one thing, although it shows some compassion on the part of this woman, it also shows that she is incapable of saying she is sorry or able to admit that she was hasty in sending an email to a business where she threatened to do them harm, whilst not knowing anything about the business or the people behind it. What an emotional roller coaster this woman's life must be. From wanting to do me harm she has turned around within a day or two and now wants to organise a fund for the education of my children. And what is this turn around based on? An email full of lies that sucked her right in. That is what it is based on.
Once again I think the above just proves that many other people in business know a lot more about it than I do. I have built my business on trust and honesty with my customers and sponsoring casinos. More times than I can count, my being honest and straightforward has done nothing but cause me trouble. I tell people what they need to hear. Not what they want to hear. And it almost always backfires on me and has me embroiled in a tongue fight. I have an erroneous reputation among many people as being a person who looks for trouble and will go out of my way to cause it. However, my responses to people and problems caused by them are just that. They are RESPONSES. I don't start arguments and fights. I just finish them.
Because people have this ridiculous idea that 'the customer is always right', they have forced businesses to mould themselves and adapt to that attitude. And if that means telling lies to a customer to defuse a volatile situation, then that is OK.
Lying to people works. The above proves it. If lying works, why wouldn't a business use that as a tool if it saves them time? You have to admit, when it works so well, it must be very tempting for a lot of businesses to tell a few little white lies.
My final response to this woman could have been as simple as saying 'thanks for the offer of help but we will manage'. However, I didn't respond that way. Instead I sent her the link to where I have posted this story on the GoneGambling site. It will most likely result in her losing the plot completely and doing everything I said she would above, but I don't care. It will simply prove I was right about her. I'll say it again. At GoneGambling the customer is only right some of the time, and when they are wrong we will tell them about it. Continuing on with this kind of business philosophy will no doubt keep causing us trouble, but we are not going to start lying to people now just because they would rather be lied to than told the truth.
Next time you catch someone in business telling you lies, don't blame them for doing it. Simply look in the mirror to find the cause. If you see a person looking back at you who has the attitude and opinion that the customer is always right, then you have found the reason and fault behind why you were lied to. If you would rather hear anything other than being told that you were wrong, then you are part of the problem in why many businesses have taken the direction they have today.